Narmu writes : “I am new to this site. I am very proud to be a Badaga girl. Our people are very loving, caring and are with humanity to a great extent except when it comes to inter caste marriage. They even accept when our boy marries a non-Badaga girl, but they really don’t accept when our girl marries with a non-Badaga boy. My view is that the parents ego plays a vital role. In today’s trends both the men and women are matured enough to choose their spouse. Any one who comes across this post, dont mistake me, its just my views”.
(Please note: This website encourages all shades of opinions from viewers. You may agree or NOT agree with the views of some but harsh comments/ posts will not be approved/published. Editing or deletion of comments is at the discretion of the author/editor- Wg Cdr JP)
This topic, in my opinion, needs our urgent attention. There is plenty of truth in what Narmu says. Do we, especially the elders in the community, need to change our mind set? Is it not time to change with the ‘changing times’?? – Wg Cdr JP
;Hakkilu Hoo [Bird Flower] found in the Nilgiri Hills
I am a non Badaga girl and I am truly in love with a Badaga boy.I respect the culture and the tradition of Badaga community and its people.I am ready to accept any criteria of society, that will support intercast marriage. I like to be a part of this community and lead a life as a simple human being. Anybody, pls reply for this….
I am new to the site but I read lot of discussion ..I have a suggestion from what I got about inter caste marriage…. All are speaking about protect our culture.
A baby is born.That small baby never knows about our culture and language. Our parents teach each and everything. We have to consider an outsider as like small a baby, and so, teach each and everything; at the same time about the culture of Badaga community so that it can spread across to various communities ..I agree
Fear is the most infectious condition in world. If you think about disaster, you will get it. Brood about death and you hasten your demise. Think positively and masterfully, with confidence and faith, and life becomes more secure, more fraught with action, richer in achievement and experience. If you are confident about the person you marry from another cast, you can easily make him or her about our tradition. Do not be very upright in your dealings for you would see by going to the forest that straight trees are cut down while crooked ones are left standing. Its change or perish in current scenario.
Hi Vinoth,
Very thoughtful post . I found your comments interesting especially
” for you would see by going to the forest that straight trees are cut down while crooked ones are left standing ” …. is this a proven fact ? I have never heard of this before yet it seems so true with regards to people’s upright dealings… If you could give some more info on this , it would be great.
Thanks,
If Intercast marriage is accepted… I doubt even this website will be still exists with the same web address…. Think in all aspects before deciding… Moreover it depends on individuals….
The communities which have resisted change have vanished, the best example is our neighbor todas, the majority of Todas changed to Christianity because of laws in community. Forget about the changes happening across world, let us first assess the situation in our community.
Someone has mentioned about the ratio, it is pathetic at present. Every big hatty has atleast 40+ males waiting to get married even though they are well qualified professionally and financially. Anyone in this forum who has someone to get married in his or her house should know well about this. If this continues, its going to affect the society badly, may lead to extramarital affairs and marrying within the seeme(akka-thange).
Its easy for a girl, if she is smart and has chosen a good person, it does not matter which community she is going to live. But think about a guy, he cannot go to his hutty, nor attend his parents funeral, its cruel. The elders have to change their mindset, they have to understand what is happening in our society and across the world. By the time these people die and rules change, lot of boys are going to lose their lives.
Kotagiri and Mekkunadu are far more better, they have accepted it, but in Thodhanadu its just like khap panchayats in Haryana. When a girl or boy is matured enough to live alone far from his or her place in India or abroad, they will be smart enough to decide their lives also. Even the middle east well known for ultra orthodox has changed, its time for us to change or else it will affect us badly.
Lets not forget, we live once, time and life are precious.
Being an unmarried girl I am against inter-caste marriage. I don’t want to tell how my parents will think then! We will surely lose our identity in the society if inter caste marriages are encouraged. Development among a community should make it grow and not to disappear… We are proud that our people today are roaming throughout the World making many changes if this is encouraged then our people will be existing and not the culture. I am against this…..
…if intercaste marriage is accepted then after a flow of years will there be people to say I proud to be a Baduga?. I ll never accept a intercaste marriage. To be frank I am first a Baduga then only Hindu or Indian.
Culture is something that one adapts. Are we not learning English to survive? Does it mean we forgot Badagu?
For people who are so strict about not adapting, should keep it to themselves and not impose on others. Why don’t we all just go back to our hatti and do agriculture and grace cows instead of using computers for any matter? We have grown because we have adapted. Lets not restrict the growth. Keep faith and culture within and let it nurish.
Main problem is not that the parents are opposing, but if the parents accept such marriages, their final rituals face lot of issues in our community. Also, the person who has done inter-caste marriage is treated as if the parents are no more their parents. Who on earth or any community for that matter devoid a child from parents just because they chose their partners. Inter state, and inter caste marriages have enriched lot of cultures since history. Those cultures who have tried to be closed have depleted soon. Its only fear that is prevailing and narrow thoughts, which we have to overcome.
We need to change, at least for the kind of global movement of our people, culture is something we have in our heart and what we follow and not in choosing a soul mate.
….no body encourages because, everybody thinks somebody will ill treat them and anybody could question them. Fear is the major factor. Unconditional love will prevail in this world. don’t condition and restrict it to ourselves. Spread love and respect, it will reflect on us. World is like a mirror, we get what we give.
I agree to what you have said Jaypee brother. Days are now changing and its a comedy that some one claims that ” karu harasudhu” comes from somewhere else!!!!
We on the whole think and like our Badugas to stay as such what we are.I think all of us have that in mind as a Baduga, but it is left to their own opinion if they need to marry their girl out side or marry a girl from other religion or caste towards their family.
Uniqueness will always be enriched with integration. Extreme thoughts will only create more rebellious actions and people will tend to drift away from our culture.Instead, if you try to accommodate some minor differences, you will win more hearts .Guidelines are better than strict rules. Indian civilization is still alive today because it did not enforce but rather accommodated so many diverse cultures along so many centuries. We do not need any police to protect such a rich community as ours. “Change is the only constant ” .Why are people opposing about changes ??
“Uniqueness will always be enriched with integration…!!!” can you please enlighten us mere mortals on how does this hold good for cultures. Calling those who don’t toe your line “Narrow Minded” doesn’t make you more evovlved!!! Just shows your disregard for others opinion..
A Culture is to be a culture only when it has an unique characteristics in it. One change will open the way for another change and then so on,then one final day our community will disappear and I totally disagree with what is posted.May be its an openion but to be a Badaga ” Save our Culture ” that is the great honour that we do to our community.Even after several we can shoot up the statement that ” I’m a proud Badaga”. Anand has given a clear statement …… while we have lots to discuss about how to save our community.
Can we call a non Badaga guy as “IYYABETTA”? CAN HE WEAR DOTHI AND DANCE IN OUR HABBA? BADAGA IS BADAGA… ….. NOBODY IS ENCOURAGING BADAGA WITH NON BADAGA MARRIAGE……. [some portion deleted - Wg Cdr JP]
Why talk about inter caste marriage? We should try to protect our culture and customs maintained by our elders. Our male female ratio is not that bad, we encourage these type of statements. Everyone will get their life partners within our community. In my opinion no need to encourage this.
Such a narrow minded thought !!! you have to evolve. Sorry about that.